Sasuke's Very Secret Diary
by Peneia Teke
Summary: Experience what really goes on in the mind of Uchiha Sasuke.  Based on the LOTR diaries by Cassie Claire.


Author's Notes: I decided to jump on the bandwagon because it sounded fun. This is based off Cassie Claire's "Very Secret Diaries" and should not be taken too seriously. This is all just good fun, after all.

Disclaimer: Don't own Naruto. **  
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**Sasuke's Very Secret Diary**

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**Day One**

Had first meeting with Jounin leader, today. Wasn't pleased with the five hour wait but didn't let it show. Yeah, I'm pretty much awesome.

Not so sure about the new teammates, though. Naruto is an annoying git who doesn't know when to shut up. Sakura is even more annoying than Naruto, if that's possible. Unfortunately, cannot kill teammates.

Blaming all misfortunes on a 'certain man'.

**Day Two**

Teammates and I had our first lesson on 'teamwork'. Have decided aforementioned concept is a waste of time. Much better things to do, anyway.

_To Do List_:

Go to store  
Buy tomatoes  
Kill older brother

**Day Three**

Left for a mission in the Wave Country this morning. Was attacked by a band of thugs on the way but was able to beat them all single handedly. Well, Kakashi might have helped a little. Dead Last couldn't do anything. Took time to gloat about my mad skills.

**Day Six**

Had my awesomeness questioned when I was unable to walk up a tree. Who does that, anyway? Competed with Naruto on the tree climbing exercise. Made sure to rub my victory in his face. Ego couldn't handle another blow.

**Day Seven**

Apparently, confused a guy for a girl. How embarrassing. Had a fight with guy/girl on the bridge. Jumped in front of Naruto when guy/girl attacked him. Not sure why I did that.

Sakura thought I died. Called her a fat cow to boost my ego. Afterwards, was annoyed to learn the villagers had named the bridge after Naruto. Lame.

**Day Ten**

Have just heard about Chunin Exams. Am slightly intrigued.

Teammates were assaulted by losers from Sand. Didn't really care but threw rocks at freak with gourd because he had a lame tattoo. Whatever. Not important, anyway. Gourd Freak said he was interested in fighting me.

Not sure what to think.

**Day Eleven**

Lost fight to a green man with huge eyebrows!! Am really pissed. Was unable to have a rematch due to start of the exam. Had no time to find an empty classroom to sulk. Will blame all misfortunes on Bastard Itachi.

Later...

First part of the exam was a written test. Go figure. Passed with flying colors. Still pissed at misfortunes.

**Day Twelve**

Currently stuck in the Forest of Death with lame ass teammates. Not cool. The mission is to collect two scrolls by the end of five days. Shouldn't be too hard, unless Dead Last does something stupid, which is possible.

Must refrain from killing teammates.

**Day Thirteen **

Was told off by Sakura when I considered surrendering the scroll. Will pretend that conversation never happened.

Don't remember much after getting bitten by Snake Man. Kicked some Sound asses for hurting Sakura. Blaming it all on hallucinogens. Don't ask.

**Day Twenty-Six**

Today sucked more than usual. Found myself in the hospital after battling Gourd Freak. Not sure what happened but Gourd Freak whipped out some crazy ass, demonic personality thing…. Definitely not in the manual.

Not only that, but Naruto beat him when I… didn't beat him. WTF?

**Day Twenty-Seven **

ITACHI came to Konoha looking for Naruto. Death attempt was unsuccessful.

Fought Naruto on the roof of the hospital after waking up from a coma. Seem to be ending up there a lot lately. Unfortunately, was interrupted by Kakashi.

Would have had him with Chidori too…

Later…

Realized Naruto's Rasengan caused more damage than Chidori. When the hell did he get stronger than me?! Am extremely pissed.

**Day Fifty-Nine**

Random loser called me the weakest Uchiha member. Not very bright considering the circumstances. Will ignore the fact that I was unable to beat him.

**Day Sixty **

Have decided to join Orochimaru in my quest for power. Wasn't going to but realized I'm sick of getting pwned by Naruto.

**Day Sixty-Four**

Left for Sound, today. Sakura tried to stop me, so I knocked her unconscious and left her on a bench. Felt bad about it afterward. Not too bad, though.

Should probably work on my people skills.

**Day Sixty-Five**

Unleashed my kick ass curse/seal thing on Naruto. Totally pwned him! Was going to kill him to obtain Mangekyou Sharingan but realized I'd be playing right into Itachi's hands. Damn….

Mangekyou is overrated, anyway.

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End file.
